I Can't Do It All

This is the beginning of a stressful time of year. I have lots of projects going on in November. Some are ending, others beginning. This year I feel like I have too many things on my plate, and I have had to reevaluate my priorities. A couple of projects are struggling or don't have everything needed for things to go smoothly. They are things that would increase my stress greatly, and I think I'm only holding onto them because of my pride.

I have to weigh the reality of stress vs. my ego. I want to be able to do everything. However, I know myself, and I know that I am better with a couple of projects that I am able to give my full attention. I don't handle stress well. This is the time of year when it is the worst, and I am actively trying to reduce my stress with yoga and meditation. I have to accept that I can't do everything. It will be better for me and everyone else around me.

It will definitely be better for my family. This is the time of year when we burn the candle at both ends, and the kids come along with me. This year I've been very focused on cutting back on the number of things we do in the evenings, so the kids can have a calmer bed time routine. It's been great for all of us. My family is absolutely my number one priority, and it makes it a little easier to let go of projects that my ego wishes I could do.

I've been thinking about my focus. It's writing and studying right now. I have a lot of other things going on, but that is what I am thinking about the most. I have to have time to do both of those things. I need to be relaxed enough to give myself the time to work on them daily.

I have an incredibly difficult time accepting that I can't (and do not have to) do everything, but I'm working on it. I'm starting to see what's more important.

A Day of Writing

Yesterday was a fabulous day. It was cold, raining, and windy. I did have any clients, and my day was free from 9am-3pm. I spent the time writing. It was fabulous. I rarely have more than an hour or two to dedicate to writing. Yesterday felt indulgent.

It's a good thing I had the time. I've been working on a Christmas play for my students, and it has been a struggle. I wrote before about how difficult it is to create a holiday show. This one has been hard. I had it almost complete but couldn't find a way to end it. I wasn't feeling good about it. I know when something isn't working, and this script was not working.

On Monday during some brief down time between classes, I had an idea. I decided the story would be better if it focused more on the antagonist than the protagonist. The protagonist was boring and not moving the show along. The rewrites would have been extensive, and I wasn't thrilled with the plot I had. I decided to just start over.

I was excited to start over. It can be a frustrating process, but this time I knew what the story would be. I knew it would be better than the previous script. Six hours later I am one scene away from finishing the script, I know how I'm going to end it, and it's a lot better than the first draft.

Such a great, productive, creative day. It was just what I needed.

A New Script

This is a good time for me, creatively. I'm finishing up a new one-act. I started writing it for my middle schoolers, but it didn't seem like a good fit for them. So, I dusted off Don't Eat the Fish Sticks, and it is working very well for my students. It was a good decision, but I didn't want to abandon the other script. It's an idea I've been working on for a while, and I want to finish it.

The first draft is almost done. I spent a few hours working on it yesterday and added a little more today. I like it. It definitely needs some revision - and an ending (the hardest part), but I like where it's going. Once I have a complete first draft, I'll do my first revision, which always involves making sure that there is a comedic bit in every scene. Audiences love to laugh, and I make it my goal to entertain with each script.

Revisions don't take a lot of time. There is not a lot of depth or intrigue to my scripts. They're made to entertain middle schoolers and their families. Make it funny. Make it over the top. Those are my goals.

I really love writing plays. Realism is not my style. I like it when impossible things happen. Theater is a perfect match.

Fish Sticks Is Cast!

The challenge: turning a script for 11 females and 2 males into a show using 6 females.

I think I have a cast list for my middle school show. Casting is the hardest part. I'd like to say that I have a process that I use every time, but I don't. I like to cast based on my gut reaction. Of course the limited number of students contributes to the casting as well. Parts are doubled, sometimes tripled. There is nothing easy about middle school theater - especially in a small school.

Casting is also affected by my whims. Sometimes I want to challenge a student and give them something that is just a little bit out of their comfort zone. Part of me definitely enjoys teaching theater. I know some people think it's just an after school program, but I like to think the kids learn something from the experience.

I'm pretty happy with the way I cast this show. I changed a couple parts to accommodate my all-female cast, and I think it's going to be good. I'm feeling a lot more relaxed now that the hardest part is over. I have my cast. Now it's time to rehearse. This part I do have a process for, though it is loosely structured and changes based on the show and the students.

The show, Don't Eat The Fish Sticks, is pretty funny. I think the students will like it. I'm excited for the read-through tomorrow. I always feel a little nervous when I start a new show. The students have to like a script, or it will not be fun. And, fun is the most important part of this whole process.

Have I mentioned I love my job?

Forced Creativity Strikes Again

I love being a theater director for middle and high school students. I love watching the kids grow more confident with each performance. I like seeing them as excited about theater as I always have been, and I like knowing that the stage provides them with a safe space to try new things. The stage was always my favorite place growing up, and it's fun to watch a new generation discover it.

As I've mentioned before, it also helps me with my writing.

Yesterday was auditions for the middle school fall show. Normally I have about 12-15 kids show up, so I choose my scripts based on those numbers. I wasn't sure what I would get this year. I lost a few of my students to high school, and I'm never sure how many 5th graders I will get. It usually works out.

This one might not.

I had 4 kids show up for auditions, and they told me of two more that want to join. Six kids. For a show with 12 parts. Oh, boy...

One thing I enjoy about theater (and have gotten pretty good at) is making things work. This script is a challenge. I've tried to double up as many parts as possible, but even then I need three more kids - and did I mention that I currently have no boys? It's not impossible, but I started trying to come up with other solutions.

Remember when I wrote about forced creativity? This job requires me to write a certain amount each year, and some of my best work has stemmed from working with my students. Hopefully, this will be one of them.

I started thinking - what if I wrote a script for my six actors for the fall and saved the bigger show for the spring (when I won't be competing with soccer)? Once I came up with this solution, things started to fall into place.

I've been working on an idea for a one act play since the spring. By working on it I mean that I had a title and a very loose idea of what I wanted it to be about. I wasn't worried because I had all year to write it.

Well, my timetable has moved up a bit.

Yesterday after auditions I used my half hour before teaching a class to start the first draft of a script currently titled The Room of Peace. So far, I really like it, and I have a pretty good idea of where it is going. The limitations of the number of actors and an all female cast actually made it easier to figure out the plot. I'm still figuring a few things out, but I think it could be really funny.

I'm still not sure what show I'll be directing this fall. I'm going to wait and see if any more students show up tomorrow. If not, I'll be spending my weekend frantically writing and hoping to avoid writer's block. But, at least I have a backup plan.

Transitions

Transitions. Difficult in writing and in life.

I'm definitely in a transition right now. The kids are both in school this year, and I haven't known what to do with myself. I have a lot of projects to work on, and I need to get ready for the shows I'm doing with the after school program. I should be studying. I should be doing a lot of things.

I'm having a hard time focusing on anything right now. The fact that I have time to myself every day is kind of overwhelming. I've been enjoying my time, but I have not been productive. This needs to change.

I need to get back to my plan of doing something every day that gets me a little bit closer to the bigger goals. Daily mini goals. I'm taking one more day off. Plus the weekend. I needed a break, and now I've had one. Monday I'm going to start being more productive.

Time for this transition to end and for things to get back to normal.

Reading

The problem with being a writer/blogger, mom of 2, personal trainer, drama director, Zumba instructor, etc. is that I have very little time to read. I love reading. Love it. There is nothing better than escaping into a different world and taking on a different life for a few hours (or days depending on the book). When I was a kid I spent hours reading - every day. Basically, any time I wasn't doing something that involved both hands, I was reading a book. My parents even let me read at the dinner table a couple of times. (Best. Parents. Ever.)

Then I had kids and bought a house and got a couple jobs. Life got busy, and I found there were a lot of other things that needed to be done. Reading became a distant memory for a while. I would squeeze it in whenever I could, but I could never read for more than an hour - if I could even find that much time.

I felt guilty about it. I want to be a writer, but I'm not reading books. When I do read, I am re-reading my old books. While I do love re-reading books until I have them almost committed to memory, I felt like I was missing out. There are so many great books out there, and I want to read them all.

Lately, I have started reading again. I've made some pretty awesome friends, and we've started a book club. It's a great excuse to start reading again (not to mention having a night out every once in a while). It's been great. Normally, even when I try to find a new book, I tend to stick to certain genres or authors. I know what I like, and while I would like to try something new, I always fall back on my favorites. The book club has introduced me to books that I never would have chosen on my own, and they've all been great.

One of my goals for the rest of 2013 is to read more. It's not going to be easy. Even with the kids at school I still have a lot going on. But, I definitely want to find the time to read more. It's my favorite way to relax. I'd like to read different genres, too, and I would love some suggestions!

What are some great books that I need to read?

Writing A Christmas Play

Sometimes my job requires me to be creative. It's a necessity more than the usual sudden urge to create. Normally pressure doesn't bother me, but with writing it's different. I can write a one-act play in a day - at least the first draft. If I have an idea that inspires me, the words just pour out, and I write until I am done. Writing under pressure is a lot harder.

I've struggled with writers' block for months on end. Years if you count the long time during college and before I had kids when I just did not allow myself to write. To know that you have a deadline on your creativity can be stressful and disappointing. I often feel worried that I'm out of ideas and have nothing left to say. I don't think that will ever actually happen, but at the time it's easy to feel like a failure.

Of course that stress can also lead to the creation of something great. I've found that the moment I stop worrying and trying to write is the moment that the ideas come. Relaxation is much more productive than stress and worry. A perfect example of this happened two years ago.

I was not doing my usual production of A Christmas Carol at the opera house, so I decided to add in another show for my middle school students. It was going to be a very short rehearsal period because our fall production goes up in mid-November. At the time, I had enough budget to cover the scripts and performance rights for one show all year. I paid for my fall show and wrote my spring show. Adding a Christmas show would mean another script that needed to be written. I thought I could manage. I had the spring show done and ready to go, so why not write another one?

Writing a Christmas play was a lot  harder than I thought it would be. How do you write something that involves such a universal theme without being too much like the classic Christmas stories? How could they not heavily influence the script? How do I make my writing style fit into a Christmas theme?

I had so many questions, and I was stuck for months. By October I was concerned. My boss was excited about a Christmas show. The students were excited. I figured I could always just do A Christmas Carol again.

That somewhat pitiful thought actually ended up being quite helpful. It helped me relax. I had an escape route in case my imagination failed me. It never had before, but there is a first time for everything. I started thinking about my students and how to fit them into Dickens' classic story.

Of course, the idea came to me first in the shower. That's where most of my writing ideas begin. It's just about the only place in my house where I can be alone to think. I've had people ask where my ideas come from, and I never know how to answer. They always just kind of happen. The plot line flows, and I have a definite beginning, middle, and end (usually). That's how Greedy Greta Visits Christmas Town started. It popped into my head, ready to be written, a day or two after I'd given up on my creativity.

The show ended up being one of my favorites. I had a great cast. I took a chance and gave the lead to a 5th grader who hadn't acted before. She played Greta as terrible and mean as she is meant to be played. It was beautiful. I like this script because it incorporates different bits from the well-known holiday stories. It has some fantastical elements in it, which gives it my usual style, but it is still a Christmasy, feel-good sort of script. The audience loved it. My students loved it. People still bring it up two years later. I don't think I'll try writing another Christmas script. I feel like I could never out-do what I've already done.

Below is the second scene from Greedy Greta Visits Christmas Town. This takes place just before she goes to Christmas Town, meets Santa, accidentally lets some goons kidnap Santa, and then has to make everything right.

Enjoy!

SCENE 2

The living room of GRETA's home. GRETA, MRS. MOONTZ, and ARIEL sit around the room.

ARIEL

Mom, Greta stole my skirt! She's wearing my skirt!

MRS. MOONTZ

            Greta, did you take Ariel's skirt?

GRETA

            She gave it to me.

ARIEL

            No, I didn't!

GRETA

            I'm not a liar!

MRS. MOONTZ

That's it! I can't stand listening to you fight. Here, Ariel, go buy a new skirt.

GRETA

            What about me?

MRS. MOONTZ

            Here take it all.

GRETA

            Thanks, Mom.

ARIEL

            Can you drive me to the mall, Mom?

MRS. MOONTZ

            I guess so. Coming, Greta?

GRETA

            No way.

MRS. MOONTZ

            Fine. I'll take you both tomorrow.

ARIEL

            But, Mom, that's not fair!

MRS. MOONTZ

            Not now, Ariel. I'm tired.

                                                            She exits.

ARIEL

            It's not fair.

She storms out. GRETA laughs. There's a knock on the door.

GRETA

            Mom! There's someone at the door! Mom!

MRS. MOONTZ

(from offstage)

            Mommy's busy, dear! Ariel, get the door!

ARIEL

(from offstage)

            No! Make Greta do it!

GRETA

Fine! I have to do everything around here. I'm coming. You can stop knocking!

She opens the door and MADELINE enters. She is an elderly woman dressed in loud, sparkling clothes and a large hat.

MADELINE

Oh, hello, dear child! My name is Madeline Bunkwith, and I am afraid I am in terrible trouble. My car has broken down, and I have no place to stay. I was traveling through town, you see. I'm going to Santa's annual Christmas party. I'm afraid I will be late now. The North Pole is so far away, you know.

GRETA

            Okay, crazy lady, you need to go now.

MADELINE

            But, I have no place to stay!

GRETA

            Well, you're not staying here.

MADELINE

You'd throw an old woman out into the cold? It's snowing!

GRETA

            Why don't you just rent a car?

MADELINE

            Good idea! Can I use your phone?

GRETA

            No. Use your cell phone.

MADELINE

            Cell phone?

GRETA

Are you kidding? You don't know what a cell phone is?

MADELINE

That doesn't matter. I don't have a cell phone. Will you help me?

GRETA

            Um, no.

She pushes MADELINE out the door and slams it shut. MADELINE bangs on the door.

           

GRETA

             Go away! Mom! Some psycho lady won't go away! Mom?

MADELINE opens the door and walks in.

MADELINE

Your mother can't hear you, Greta. She and your sister have gone away for the moment.

GRETA

            How do you know my name?

MADELINE

I know a great deal. I know where your family is. I know how to unlock doors. I also know that you are on Santa's naughty list, and I have been brought here to help you see the error of your ways.

GRETA

You're nuts. I'm calling the cops if you don't get out of here. Mom! Mom! Get in here!

MADELINE

I told you she is not here. They are safe, and you will see them again when you can better appreciate them.

GRETA

            I don't believe you.

MADELINE

Go and see. You won’t find them. Go on. I can wait.

GRETA runs off stage. MADELINE  looks around the room while she waits and starts doing a little dance to pass the time. She hums Christmas carols while she dances.

GRETA returns looking concerned.

GRETA

            Where are they?

MADELINE

What's this? Concern for others? Maybe I'm at the wrong house.

GRETA

I only care because it's Ariel's night to do the dishes, and I'm not going to get stuck doing them just because some crazy lady thinks Santa Claus is mad at me.

MADELINE

He's disappointed, dear. Santa doesn't get mad. The naughty list is very, very short. Santa likes to think every child is truly good on the inside.

GRETA

So what now, magical clown lady? Are you going to show me visions of my past that will explain why I am such a terrible child?

MADELINE

            Something like that.

The stage goes dark. When the lights come back up, SPITS is kneeling on stage, working on something.

           

GRETA

            Why are we here? I thought this was my past.

MADELINE

Your friend, Stanley, made you a beautiful necklace for Christmas last year. Do you remember?

GRETA

He gives me some hideous thing every year. I keep telling him to just give me cash.

MADELINE

He works all year to make your gift special. This is the seventeenth necklace he's made, and he finally thinks it's perfect. What did you say when he gave it to you?

GRETA

I just told you. I asked for cash, and I tossed the necklace in the trash. It was ugly.

MADELINE

            Don't you feel sorry for acting so terribly?

GRETA

No way. If he was a real friend, he'd give me what I want.

SPITS looks sadly at the necklace and throws it offstage. He slowly exits. ABBY enters. She is holding an iPod and crying.

MADELINE

            What about Abby?

GRETA

            What about her?

MADELINE

Her parents made great sacrifices to buy her an iPod last Christmas, and you threw it out the window of a car! She was heart broken. On Christmas! It's just not right.

GRETA

I'll tell you what wasn't right. Abby got an iPod, and I didn't. That is not okay.

MADELINE

What makes you think you deserve more than others?

GRETA

All I wanted was a new iPod. Mine’s outdated.

MADELINE

Some things are more important than possessions.

GRETA

            Right.

MADELINE

None of this is getting through to you, is it? Very well. I'll try another approach.

She waves her arms, and the stage goes dark. When the lights come back on, ABBY and ARIEL are dancing while MR. &MRS. MOONTZ, SPITS, and several other kids watch.

GRETA

            What is this? Abby and Ariel don't dance.

MADELINE

This is a different kind of Christmas. This is how Christmas would be if you had never existed.

GRETA

Yeah right. What's next? Are the Whos going to come out and start singing and suddenly my heart will grow lighter and I'll understand the true meaning of Christmas? You’ve been watching too many Christmas specials, lady.

MADELINE

I'm trying to help you, Greta. Can't you at least try to understand what I'm showing you?

GRETA

What are you showing me? That Christmas would be better if everyone danced around like an idiot?

MADELINE

They're happy! Don't you get it? They are happier without you. Doesn't that bother you?

GRETA

            Not really.

MADELINE

You are an impossible child! Fine. You leave me no choice.

She waves her hands, and the stage goes dark.

Plays By Em

It's been a really long time since I posted anything here. I could make a lot of excuses, but I really just let other areas of my life take over for a while. I added a couple new jobs. My schedule gets busier the older the kids get. It can be hard to find the time to write.

I have managed to do some writing. I've got a couple new books started, and I've written a few more plays. The one act plays for my middle school students have really been going well. I'm lucky to have a job that pretty much requires me to write a play every year. It's nice to be able to stage them and figure out what needs to be fixed. The kids and audiences have liked them pretty well. I wrote a Christmas one that had a really great reception.

I'm having a back to school special on my scripts. They are all one acts, run under an hour, and are perfect for middle or high school actors. Perfect for one act festivals. For any teachers/directors, you can find the complete list of plays here: Plays By Em

So, I am back to blogging and back to focusing on my writing. It is still my goal to make a living doing the thing I love most, so I need to start dedicating more time to making it happen. I need to take more chances and believe in my abilities.

In addition to my writer ramblings, I'll be posting bits and pieces of my writing. I'd love some feedback. The scariest thing is letting other people see my work. What better place to do it than on a blog?